After my publication of Jean’s confession (which quite graphically shows his appalling inner landscape), I still have to face his desperate attempts to intimidate me and my friends (Laura, her family) and to destroy my confidence and freedom of choice, choice which was to start a new life away from him. It is indeed an intense learning experience, one which I hope will help readers to deepen their knowledge about the inherently pathological nature of some people, and how it can affect each and every one of us.
I’ve copied below his last email, which I’ll be addressing step by step. As usual, I’m sharing this data anonymously, removing any personal reference, etc., because my point is not to make his life more difficult, but to give readers an opportunity to decipher ‘psychopathological’ language and mode of functioning. These data, taken from real life, offer a great learning opportunity. It’s also a good exercise for me, as having to look at his sick rants with the critical distance needed for objective assessment – to look at it clinically and publish my comments for others to read – somewhat relieves the anxiousness and apprehension of having to read his threats and attempts at intimidation on my own, without anyone to bear witness to his twisted thinking.
Now, if it is for me to think how to proceed.
Here there is enough to start several counts of accusation: [against LKJ and her family]
–Public defamation [referring to the publication of my testimonial and his confession]
It is not public defamation, since only pseudonyms were used – despite the obvious fact that more than one person near Jean might benefit from learning about the indecent, predatory and dehumanized behavior he has shown. It is also true, written in his own words – which he does not deny – and given to me at the time, with the mention:
BTW, while formatting my computer, I forgot to save the 20 pages ‘filth’ I sent you. So you’re the only one to own the SOLE document. I think it’s not useless for you to be aware of that. For you to judge!
Apparently, he forgot that he had saved a draft version of that ‘document’, written in an email draft, with all the identifiers intact.
–Abuse of Power
The Sott/Cass owners have been persecuted by the police based on his lies, and for more than a year, I’ve been living in constant fear and stress SIMPLY because he wasn’t capable of accepting that, one day, I took the decision to start a life without him, after years of what can minimally be described as psychological abuse by a pathological mind devoid of any real consideration for my well-being and the well-being of others. Talk about abuse of power.
Maybe the only ‘abuse of power’ is that which makes someone think that others are property rather than human beings free to decide if they want to continue a life with someone. Is that so difficult to understand? Is it so difficult for him to start his own life without further undermining the confidence and freedom of the person he professed to ‘love’?
–Opposing the right of reply
The right of reply has always been open to Jean – as it is to anyone who signs up on this blog or on Sott.net and decides to leave a comment. In fact, it would be interesting to see what he comes up with. It’s easy to harass, lie to and manipulate a lonely prey, but far less easy to do so in a place with many witnesses who can – and will – point out the insanity of his ‘reasoning’.
–Intimidation by force
Yeah right… I can quote many examples of ‘intimidation by force’ by this man. For instance, this particular bit of BS which he sent me (before I published my testimonial) after an ‘argument’ over the diet of the children – Jean blames me for imposing ‘restrictions’ on them. For him, restriction means questioning foods that are harmful for health, like cow milk and sugar. (BTW, when Jean was still living with us, he agreed that cow milk was bad for health… yeah, you’ve gotta love those changes of mask).
Anyway, in this extract, Jean threatens to reveal the ‘truth’ about me to my friends and family IF I refuse to talk to him (meaning: if I refuse to shut up, listen to and agree with his nonsensical word salad, which BTW displays an utter ignorance regarding health and diet – but we’ll come to that later, stay tuned):
If you accept to discuss, to not elude issues, then we can advance. If you don’t, I’ll be obliged to expose the truth, the so misused truth, to everyone who believed they supported you for good reasons, whereas all you did was lying to everyone, to yourself, to the children, to me.
The last sentence is particularly telling, in terms of intimidation, distortion and projection. Keep in mind that the above nonsense and accusations of ‘lying’ are coming from a man who plotted behind my back with his good friend in order to ‘get me’, who hacked into my mailbox, who stole all the data from my hard drive, who phoned my mother and one of my friends behind my back, who went to the police to report I was in a ‘cult’, etc. etc. and who, once, wrote this about me:
‘Jean’: All I wish is to have teeth sharp enough to bite her, argh, i’d like to inject a poison into her, so that she will beg me after. Seriously, she’s far more moronic than I thought. The absolute trap would be: we plan to visit her together, and then you bail out.
Friend: No worries for me, but you can’t do that twice, she’s not stupid
‘Jean’: Yes she, she is very stupid. As naive as she is, she’ll never think that we’re talking about her, and that we plan things behind her back… In her mind, when people chat together it must mean they’re flirting, so (…) she doesn’t think straight, remember.
But he doesn’t show the slightest shame or contrition for displaying such ugliness of mind. No! Instead, he’s accusing others of all the things he’s been guilty of literally for all his life.
I think his functioning is so deeply pathological that he’s not capable of even imagining other ways outside of his own. Other ways that don’t imply coercion, control, lying, maneuvering… again, projecting onto others what he is inside. Typical.
–Infringement of copyright
It would be interesting to see Jean taking legal actions to defend as intellectual property a confession of horrible acts devoid of any humanity and moral decency.
–The methods of black propaganda worthy of the Stasi are well known in cult circles:
Black Propaganda http://www.anti-scientologie.ch/definitions.htm #
It seems he doesn’t take into account that the above very well fits with his own behavior towards me :
– Blackmail and emotional manipulation.
– Putting in serious doubt my ethics and personal choices when seeing they no longer fit his own purposes.
– Hostility to the possibility that I broaden the scope of my relations, if the latter are not closely controlled and managed by him.
I made the CHOICE of leaving a man who psychologically abused me and continues to do so in the most blatant way, with his blackmail and threats – thereby proving by his very actions that all the warnings my friends gave me before I left him were spot on.
You see, in his twisted mind, there can be no other life for me except under his control. If my choices don’t fit his views of how I should behave and what I should decide, it means I’m controlled/influenced/manipulated through « black propaganda » (and why not Nazi propaganda, since we’re at it?)
–I informed myself.
What you do not understand is that what happens is exactly what I wanted. Sometimes the best way is not to play:)
And now the game starts. [You gotta play hardball, here]
Notice the pathological gambling and how he seems to revel in his little manipulation games, without the slightest awareness of the suffering that his harassment and lies are causing me and all of my friends.
Zero empathy, zero capacity for remorse, zero capacity for introspection, zero capacity for self-doubt and assessment of his actions.
–The ultimate proof that this is a destructive cult, the worst.
The ultimate proof that they manipulate you and you do exactly the worst infamy they require of you.
How they control you? You also have confided in? You’re afraid.
I’ve indeed often been ‘afraid’ during the past years – afraid of HIS behaviour, which, sometimes, when we were still together, I used to think verged on insanity. Now, I don’t think it just ‘verges’ on insanity.
Where is his proof of me being manipulated? What infamy? Having left him and exposed his true self (even if anonymously) is certainly considered as an infamy for him.
Jean seems unable to understand what friendship and concern for others means: for him it’s all a power game where he has to win at all costs. In his world of extreme competition and control, there is no room for honest friendship and support among human beings, and so he blames my friends and myself of doing what he himself does – since for him, controlling behaviour and manipulation are the only options available. A truly scary and chilling inner landscape.
–You also have given them information about you and you would not want this to be disclosed publicly.
Sure, they would surely publish it if you removed yourself from their hold.
AND SO WHAT!
He just can’t let go of the idea that I just might have a mind of my own, that I just might have made choices of my own and that those choices included getting him out of my life (which is the main thing he can’t stand) and, of course, all of that HAS to be due to cultic control!! In his mind, only a ‘guru’ more powerful than him, with better manipulation and control techniques than his own, could be able to ‘break the hold’ he thought he had on me.
Anyway, Jean is saying that ‘they’ (ah, you’ve got to love that mythical – dare I say ‘conspiratorial’? – threatening, nebulous ‘they’) coerced me into writing and publishing my testimonial, and that if I had ‘removed myself from their hold’, they would have ‘revealed’ those things I talk about, probably as an attempt to ‘break’ me – as if there was anything in this testimonial that could cause me trouble if people knew about it.
In fact, IF, as a result of reading that testimonial, people who are supposed to be my friends were to choose to keep away from me, well it’d just mean they’re NOT true friends and are just hypocrites more interested in the appearance of friendship than by sincerity, honesty and true caring. So why should I care about losing such ‘friends’?
–The truth is that we have much less to fear from them than they do from us.
This is obvious if not – they would not feel obliged to go that far.
Here comes his pitch. He’s now so sure that he has made me afraid of my friends that he and I have miraculously became a ‘WE’! Clever manipulation technique… Take note, reader, this is a perfect textbook case of pathological thinking and ploys.
The idea that I never want to see him again, never want to hear his voice, have to read his crap, think about him, etc., is impossible! Only a powerful cult that has super mind-control methods could have turned me against him!
–It’s unfortunate that you find yourself enlisted in this mess, you did not deserve that.
Poor me… I could have been living with him and his perversions and rage forever…
After defaming me, insulting me (“wh***”, “you could not last 3 days without me”, “you’re worse than the day I met you”) now he’s saying that “I didn’t deserve that”.
This looks like the psychopath’s MO: when words don’t match actions, when they confuse your mind and drive you crazy with their contradictory statements and behavior – one day very nice and utterly charming, the next day treating you like a piece of s**t and acting all surprised that you’re even upset by it.
Once he stayed away for three days and was lying asleep on the bed when she came in midmorning. “Where have you been?” she cried. “I’ve been so worried. Where were you?”
He looked sour as he woke up. “Don’t ever ask me that,” he snapped. “I won’t have it.”
“Where I go, what I do, who I do it with – it doesn’t concern you, Elsa. Don’t ask.”
He was like a different person. But then he seemed to pull himself together, shook the sleep off, and reached out to her. “I know it hurts you,” he said in his old gentle way, “but I think of jealousy as a flu, and wait to get over it. And you will, baby, you will.” Like a mother cat licking her kitten, he groomed her back into trusting him.
Robert Hare, This Charming psychopath
–And I speak not of children.
But this will be avoided …
Just need to wait a few weeks.
As I said before, all you have is to follow the news.
If you really have friends in the group, tell them to run and protect themselves with a few documents.
It could be that spectacular … EPIC FAIL.
That is supposed to be conveyed to my friends and make them shake in their boots.
And what ‘group’ anyway? What is he talking about IN FACT? I know a forum which I’m a member of. I’ve offered to do translations for Sott and Pilule Rouge because I enjoy it. It happens that, on SOTT and on the forum, I have a group (there’s that suspicious, conspiratorial word again… “you have what? ‘a group’?” *shudder*) of friends who, because they supported me in my decision to end this caricature of a relationship, he’s now bent on destroying. Is it what he’s talking about?
His use of the term ‘group’ – without giving any name or any indication that he’s actually talking about individuals – not only serves to protect himself from defamation charges, but also to dehumanize Laura and her family (since, of course, it’s these people he’s targeting and talking about, first and foremost). By referring to these individuals as ‘the group’, he wants to convey to his ‘audience’ the impression of some vague, threatening and tentacular entity operating and controlling their ‘robot-followers’ from some obscure (maybe underground?) HQ.
Talking about these human beings as ‘the group’ (a euphemism for ‘the cult’) incites the unaware reader to see them as not human – therefore not capable of suffering, of emotions, of pain – and to view them as that threatening entity whose only aim is to ‘control’ and ‘enslave others’. For what ends? We don’t know. ‘They’ don’t have money, ‘they’ give EE classes for a ridiculously low fee, ‘they’ make available tons of material for free through the forum and the Cass websites, ‘they’ work all day like crazy. Maybe, in Jean’s mind, ‘they’ are just demons sucking at people’s soul? It might sound comical, but we’re not far from that, actually. Shades of the Inquisition… as the good crusader that he is, Jean probably imagines ‘them’ burning at the stake while I look at him with adoring eyes:
Just look at how one man can outstrip a clique of impostors
Yeah, by ‘one man’, he’s means himself.
And this is this same guy who’s accusing others of being ‘megalomaniac gurus’. Talk about projection again. Yawn.
–You have a choice to make, and most important of all your life.
Like I didn’t already make that choice by ditching him?
This dramatic tone is supposed to make me shake in my boots too. I’m not far from feeling like in a Star Wars movie. Oh wait, he actually believes Laura is Darth Vader!
This is what he wrote once on the now defunct GLP thread:
In our view, transformation is more like that of Anakin Skywalker into Darth Vader. Their assessment of life has been reworked from a borderline personality who has rocked in fanaticism.
– Do not drown yourself in too much information, intellectualization and rationalization.
It’s clear that Jean resents me for getting informed (mainly about psychopathy, narcissism and other pathological disorders…no wonder).
But anyway, since I’m supposed to be controlled by ‘the cult’, I have no will or mind of my own anymore, right? So how could I be capable of ‘intellectualization’ and reasoning, and to get ‘too much information’? I’m just supposed to follow orders and obey through threats and coercion, right?
So make up your mind buddy. Am I mind-controlled, or am I thinking too much? Mmm, maybe I’m actually mind-controlled into thinking too much?
It’s just the question of how now you have the power to help others.
Directly, bypassing the will of another.
That’s truer than he realizes, though not the way he thinks!
–Accept that you have that power.
No one have never had as much as you, decide alone.
I guess what he is saying is that I have the power to join him in declaring that Laura runs a cult that mind-programmed me. Which in the end is submitting to HIS power: (emphatic tone) “If you don’t think, feel, and say like me, it means you’ve been programmed and I’m gonna destroy you because you’re on the Dark Side.”
Where have we seen that one already?
It is just inconceivable that people like Jean – who are clearly mentally disturbed, based on their utter obsession for… well, for anything that makes them tick… last target being Laura and her family being a “cult” – have the slightest legal support to achieve their purposes that are far from having any degree of moral decency.